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The Clowngress Countdown Story: Debt Ceiling 24

24 July 2011

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Posted by Ags Nightmare

As everyone knows by now, Clowngress is meeting behind closed doors this weekend to hammer out a deal that would allow us to raise our countries debt ceiling a few trillion dollars so the corporate plutocrats can continue to keep their global stock market bubble inflated. For the next several days of meetings, our representatives will assemble to...

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You Want To Create Jobs Clowngress? We Must Become Unproductive

17 July 2011

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Posted by Ags Nightmare

Yep. You heard it hear first! Encourage already brain dead Americans to become mouth breathing chili eating with their fingers apes. If you have to be at work at 8, show up at 11 AM! If you have a deadline,miss it and take a piss on your bosses desk before you leave the office marking out your initials in pee with a Chinese symbol next to...

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In Honer of The Maria Fibre Optic Cable Award

20 June 2011

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Posted by Ags Nightmare

I just have to throw this oldie of mine out there. I remember back in 2000 before the Nasdaq crashed, Abby Joseph Cohen brought the gavel down at the New York Stock Exchange and the frigging head of the thing fell off when she hit the round slab of wood. We crashed a few weeks later. Now I’m pissed because she cursed the Cubs for another 100...

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Mid Year Bowl of Stoopid Award and Dumb Stuff

20 June 2011

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Posted by Ags Nightmare

Today was just another summer stoopid rally. A stoopid rally, (I know I spell stupid wrong so leave me alone), is one where the market goes up on no volume for no reason. Often the day is filled with violent 30 seconds short squeezes where the Tony Dow Jokes goes up 75 points then hovers in mid air like a wet snot hanging on a railing in the...

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I Wish I were An Oscar Meyer Weiner

06 June 2011

1 Comments

Posted by Ags Nightmare

Screw it if you think this has nothing to do with the stock market. This crotch rocket was one of the guys I used to think was one of the good guys but his wanker like the guy’s from Louisiana got in the way of being politically correct. Seriously. You can not make this sheet up. A guy named Weiner exposed his crotch to some 21 year old yet...

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Pigs at the Tech Trough..Vulture Capitalist Swine..No AG pics

02 June 2011

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Posted by Ags Nightmare

If you noticed during this weeks TONY DOW decline, fantasy companies and triple digit pieces of sheet continued to get a bid. A stock like Nutflix for the Dog Ball reason even though Hulu bagged Mirimax. Look at a stock like Crapple, because Steve Jobs said the word cloud and is still healthy. Wheeee! He is going to say “cloud on...

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We Are In the WTF? Bubble

31 May 2011

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Posted by Ags Nightmare

OK, humor me for a minute. WTF is going on? We had disastrous economic news on the home front today and did a John Holmes into the close again. Personally I do not care as I think our stock market is not real. I truly believe with all my heart there is no stock market. Only manipulation by the plutocrats. Go back and look at all the...

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If Yahooligans Get It Cramericans Suck a Lot

18 May 2011

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Posted by Ags Nightmare

Check out this headline and a few of the comments. Still think we ain’t playing a game of EA Stocks? Oh, and fark you Jimmy Jones Cramit. You do suck a lot. A one decision pump monkey with no hair who sells books to people living in a van down by the river. A mania genius but a crying game sissy when crap reverses on him. In essence, an...

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We Live In A Flea Market Economy

12 May 2011

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Posted by Ags Nightmare

This post is for you Larry Krudlow. I am handing out my braying jackass award early this year for the most obnoxious kool aide drinker on Wall Street. You win Larry. I wanted to stick forks into my eyeballs tonight. There are two things I have learned to never trust in my life. One is any financial pundit that does not have an upper lip and...

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Bernank: What a Peformance!

28 April 2011

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Posted by Ags Nightmare

The title of the post pretty much summarizes what every CNBS paid monkey spewed after the first ever Fed press conference. A Performance? With that said, lets look at the definition of performance. Point is this was not a press conference, it was American Federal Reserve Idol. To reiterate. according to the media, or brain dead ass wipes, this was...

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