5 replies to this topic

[Pulp_Cutter]

Political Jokes link



Dear Red States:

We're ticked off at the way you've treated California and we've decided we're leaving.

We intend to form our own country and we're taking the other Blue States with us.

In case you aren't aware that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast.

We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation and especially to the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up briefly:

You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states.

We get stem cell research and the best beaches.

We get Elliot Spitzer. You get Ken Lay.

We get the Statue of Liberty. You get OpryLand.

We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom.

We get Harvard. You get Ole' Miss.

We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs.
You get Alabama.

We get two-thirds of the tax revenue. You get to make the red states
pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition's we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms.

Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro choice and anti war and we're going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight ask your evangelicals. They have kids they're apparently willing to send to their deaths for no purpose and they don't care if you don't show pictures of their children's caskets coming home.

We wish you success in Iraq and hope that the WMDs turn up but we're not willing to spend our resources in Bush's Quagmire.

With the Blue States in hand we will have firm control of 80% of the country's fresh water, more than 90% of the pineapple and lettuce, 92% of the nation's fresh fruit, 95% of America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90% of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the US low sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven
Sister schools plus Harvard, Yale, Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT.

With the Red States you will have to cope with 88% of all obese Americans and their projected health care costs, 92% of all US mosquitoes, nearly 100% of the tornadoes, 90% of the hurricanes, 99% of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100% of all televangelists, Rush
Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia.

We get Hollywood and Yosemite, thank you.

38% of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62% believe life is sacred unless we're discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44% say that evolution is only a theory, 53% that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61% of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.

We're taking the good pot too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico.

Sincerely,
Author Unknown in New California.

[WorkingPoor]

Pulp_Cutter, on 11 February 2012 - 05:06 PM, said:

We're taking the good pot too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico.

Sincerely,
Author Unknown in New California.

[detachedbear]

The Civil War is over.  We all lost.  Still, it would be stupid to fight it again.

[Slipnslide]

detachedbear, on 12 February 2012 - 08:52 PM, said:

The Civil War is over.  We all lost.  Still, it would be stupid to fight it again.

Apparently, Pulp Cutter wasn't too fired-up about the outcome of the first one.

[Pulp_Cutter]

detachedbear, on 12 February 2012 - 08:52 PM, said:

The Civil War is over.  We all lost.  Still, it would be stupid to fight it again.

Certainly all were losers, but I remain unconvinced the conflict is over.  Further, I think it started long before the Civil War - back when the Barbados planters first moved their autocratic slave state to South Carolina.  For over a century before the  1860s, the South agitated to bring more territory under their system, envisioning a 'golden crescent' that extended down past Nicaragua.  Much of the impetus behind our wars with Mexico and Spain stem from this.  I'd say little has changed.  Parts of the South - including unfortunately the elected leadership - still embrace power heirarchies and corruption as the natural order of things, to a degree that the rest of America does not.  I think the wisdom of the union SHOULD be discussed.

This obviously does not mean all Southerners - who include some of the most heroic warriors for human rights in history; e.g., MLK, Jr, or Faulkner, who was a Southerner to his core.

The Deep South voted Democratic to punish Lincoln, as a block, for nearly a century.  Then, when the Kennedy/Johnson WhiteHouse imposed the Civil Rights Act on them, they switched to the GOP, despite the fact that the GOP is screwing over poor white Southerners.  So - my question is, for whom do you think the Civil War is over?

[qqqbear]

White Flight: Atlanta and the Making of Modern Conservatism
(Politics and Society in Twentieth Century America) [Hardcover]
Kevin M. Kruse (Author)

Publication Date: September 12, 2005 | Series: Politics and Society in Twentieth Century America

During the civil rights era, Atlanta thought of itself as "The City Too Busy to Hate," a rare place in the South where the races lived and thrived together. Over the course of the 1960s and 1970s, however, so many whites fled the city for the suburbs that Atlanta earned a new nickname: "The City Too Busy Moving to Hate."

In this reappraisal of racial politics in modern America, Kevin Kruse explains the causes and consequences of "white flight" in Atlanta and elsewhere. Seeking to understand segregationists on their own terms, White Flight moves past simple stereotypes to explore the meaning of white resistance. In the end, Kruse finds that segregationist resistance, which failed to stop the civil rights movement, nevertheless managed to preserve the world of segregation and even perfect it in subtler and stronger forms.

Challenging the conventional wisdom that white flight meant nothing more than a literal movement of whites to the suburbs, this book argues that it represented a more important transformation in the political ideology of those involved. In a provocative revision of postwar American history, Kruse demonstrates that traditional elements of modern conservatism, such as hostility to the federal government and faith in free enterprise, underwent important transformations during the postwar struggle over segregation. Likewise, white resistance gave birth to several new conservative causes, like the tax revolt, tuition vouchers, and privatization of public services. Tracing the journey of southern conservatives from white supremacy to white suburbia, Kruse locates the origins of modern American politics.